Children

The Bible tells us that children are a gift or heritage from the LORD (Ps 127:3). In an age and time when couples are having difficulty conceiving and our population is not replacing itself, indeed the fruit of the womb is a reward. The Scripture continues, "How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them." (Ps 127:5). Unlike the generations of our forebears who had many children, the younger generations are not keen on having more than two. It could be due to the effective campaign by the government to stop at two or more possibly, the changing demands in modern living, where the cost of raising children does not come cheap. Well those who have more are certainly blessed by the LORD; some say a quiver full contains at least a dozen arrows like Jacob of old.

Children, when they are young, are bundles of joy to behold and cradle. Young parents would soon find that their lives would revolve around their child(ren). From changing diapers (or nappies) to feeding and outings, these are the exciting journeys every parent goes through. Whenever they are not well, not only will there be the anxious moments but also the long wait to see the pediatrician, especially a popular one. Feeding your sick child with medicine could also pose a great challenge and sometimes we need God's wisdom to guide us. I remembered we tried mixing the medicine with our child's milk one time to get the sugar to go down. Somehow the young child would be able to detect the difference and refused to drink. But we managed nonetheless.

When children are slightly older, we can do a lot more talking, reading and playing with them. The time invested in our children when they are young would certainly not go to waste. Many young parents leave it to their child-minders to look after their kids without counteracting the possible harmful effects this arrangement could bring. As parents, we read to our children Children/Bible stories and taught them how to pray. It's wonderful to hear their prayers when they were young because it reveals the simplicity of a child-like faith. In one of the many voice recordings made when they were younger, they prayed for an oikos couple who longed for a child but were apparently unable to conceive. Together with the prayers of the saints, the couple eventually conceived the next year and had yet another child later.

The Bible instructs fathers not to provoke their children to anger but to raise them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Eph 6:4). Implied in this verse is the control men ought to have over their faculties and emotions, especially their temper. Because they are young and impressionable, the things we say and do would leave a lasting impression on our children. Instead, we are to role model the life of a believer in the way we live out our Christian life. There is a need to teach them the Word of God and how to pray; more importantly how to go about maintaining a consistent devotional time with God. This is all part and parcel of Christian discipline and virtues that we ought to inculcate in them. Our elder child does not seem to have much problem in this area but the younger one needs more reminding. As we train our children in the way they should go, when they grow old they will not depart from it (Pr 22:6).

Children's education is an area where parents can fret much over. Many would start planning ahead of time where they would like to put their child(ren), whether it be playgroup, nursery, kindergarten or primary school. Young children have no choice to determine their school destiny; parents would choose for them based on their judgment as to what is expedient for them. We chose for our children a kindergarten and a primary school that is affiliated to an Anglican church as we would like to imbue in them Christian principles and values. Of course, the reputation of the schools concerned also played an important role in our choice. Getting into the primary school wasn't automatic as my wife had to volunteer her services. It was through much prayer and fasting that our elder child secured a place.

Now that they are much older, our children can and have made a choice regarding which secondary school they would like to attend. However, we still had to guide them and give them all the necessary information to help them make an informed choice. We encouraged them to work towards their respective goals by attaining good results for their PSLE, pumping in resources wherever possible. Sheryl by virtue of her artistic talents would like to go to SOTA but admission was through DSA. She didn't have an art portfolio, so I got her to see my Art teacher colleague who graciously agreed to help and guide her. I believe the skills sets that she picked up in building up her portfolio and going through the Talent Academy selection test cum interview would stand her in good stead for future challenges. To cut the long story short, she got into SOTA and has successfully completed Year 1. She has been inspired during the holidays to do a lot of artwork to hone her skills.

Shermaine on the other hand went to Anglican High, another missions school near our place. She has been doing very well in her studies and is enjoying her CCA which is NPCC. The camaraderie forged both in class and in her CCA has been wonderful. In their teenage years, friends or peers play an important role in shaping our children's destiny. We have to keep an eye on the people they are mixing with to ensure that there are no harmful influences. This year she applied for the Temasek Academy (through DSA) after having visited the School Open House and talked with us. Again to cut the long story short, she has been accepted and would start the new term next year in the Integrated Programme of TJC. She made it through on the basis of her own merits. It would certainly be a new chapter for her as she works toward getting a good A level certificate, while Sheryl her International Baccalaureate diploma.

Children in their teenage years will have a mind of their own, learning to assert their independence yet at the same time still dependent on us. As parents, we have to continually engage them. Our roles would have to evolve as well; from that of being a parent to that of being a friend or mentor as they grow up. At any rate, the joys and tribulations of parenthood continues.